I remember the barber putting talc on the back of my neck from a sort of puffer thing and then brushing my neck with a soft brush. That’s when I used to go to a barber.

I remember Walker’s liquorice toffees. And I remember the feeling as I chewed on my last ever one. I remember the hole that appeared in my gum and I remember managing not to bite my crown that was now floating round my mouth in a wad of gooey liquorice toffeeness. And I remember my lovely lovely dentist glueing my crown back in the next day. Watch this space.

I remember Lou Reed saying John Lennon's Imagine, which everyone treated as sacred, was rubbish - I think the quote was 'John Lennon - Imagine - shit'. Hopefully he would appreciate my equal incomprehension of the deference that has suddenly arisen around his oeuvre foll0wing his death. Walk On The Wild Side was good, but mainly because of Herbie Flowers' bass line and all the coloured girls going 'do, d do, d do, do d do' etc. Perfect Day was bolleaux. Rock and roll influence? Nil. Hope they don't do a Glee special.