I remember Dave Hawkey running the candy floss stall at the Tiffin Fair. He did it every year – well for a couple of years at least. I went with him once to collect the machine. Can't recall where we drove to. Barnes?

I remember Barney stalking me at Linda's stables. On second thoughts he was probably stalking her! He used to be sitting in the Barney van waiting for her and I would be sitting in my dad's car waiting for her. Very strange.

I remember sewing an imaginary needle & thread through my fingers and shoulder and then pulling it taut. Very amusing when performed for small children. Uncle Vic used to do it for me.

I remember, while train-spotting on a bridge behind Caters in New Malden, being told there was a man nearby with a glass eye who would take it out, polish it and put it back in.

I remember a checkout boy at Waitrose being confused by a bunch of daffodils. He gave up trying to find them on the system and asked us what they were. We told him and he replied, 'Oh, I thought they were salad onions. What do you do with them?'

I remember Lobster (for that was his nickname, as he was often red-faced and it sort of rhymed with his real name) asking me if one of my colleagues was 'hommosexual' (that's how he pronounced it) as if it was a 'bad thing' - or even relevant.

I remember Margarita Pracatan.